1. Do We Need to Face Death to Truly Appreciate Life?

[smkelly]

Life and death are intrinsically connected throughout this novel, as Bud’s confrontations with death are what drive him to begin to truly live.

Do you believe this is an extreme position? Must we confront death so head-on in order to appreciate our lives?

[JudyT]

Not necessarily, but I feel like if we’ve had a close personal experience with death, it speeds up, and perhaps makes even deeper and more meaningful, our appreciation for life.

[waiting4adragon]

Hard to say - maybe not for everyone.

But my dad had a traumatic experience years ago, having two seizures in one day (he wasn't prone to them.) That changed his world completely.

He wasn't a bad person in my eyes - always a good, funny, lovable guy. But it made him reflect more on how some of his actions in the past may have hurt people, and that's not how he wanted to live out the rest of his life.

He started being more sensitive to others, going to church, and even wrote a poem called "Wake up call" to reflect on his life.

[rsnessa]

I think you do appreciate life more after you make it through some of life’s challenges.

[rsnessa]

I think you can enjoy life and have an amazing life without experiencing death. However, as you go through life and work your way through life’s challenges, which sometimes include the loss of other people and pets, I do believe you learn to appreciate the good things at a deeper level.
At least that’s been my experience at 61.

[Vpoole788]

I dont think we really do. I have been a nurse for 28 years. The first 10 years of my nursing was in a nursing home, administering meds to comfort the dying. I held their hands surrounded, sometimes, by loved ones. I appreciated the fact that they lived their life. However, it did not change the trajectory of how I lived mine. I continue to work long hours, years later. I raised 2 children. I gave them the life that I thought they wanted but never stopped, or thought, I could do what I wanted. I work.
The funerals that Bud attended really made me think. I couldn't help but think maybe Tim and Clara were a "guardian angel" of sorts. His conversation, her slight of hand when at the unfamiliar funerals. Brought to him to help him live his best life.

[WithLime]

Being confronted with death is certainly a quick way to get the perspective though other life experiences may open the door. Still, you need to have felt something akin to grief to begin to feel empathy and start to understand. I think it's a conscious choice to search for moments of joy and gratitude each day that will move you forward to contentment and happiness.

[BetVee]

I think part of this depends on your stage of life. When I was young, it was not at the forefront of my life until I had a traumatic loss. Then death defined me for a long time. The pain faded and life went on. Now that I’m older and have experienced significant health challenges, I see my expiration date in the rearview mirror. I think about it more and I try to make my time more meaningful, especially with my children and grandchildren. I find myself having more gratitude in most things. In the USA, I don’t think we experience death firsthand like our grandparents did, it makes a big difference on how we handle it too.